Question

@JaredMurray

How can I watch a movie without him.

How can I watch a movie without him.

How can I watch a movie without him.

Did I have an appointment with grief this morning?  I thought I was going to clean up the downstairs.  Ok.  Calm down.

Five things I see:  all the art on the wall opposite, especially the poster of Eileen Donan.  Stuffed poodles.  A real toy poodle.  A pot plant in a plant pot. The face of Matt Ryan on the cover of SCREENtime. 

Four things I feel:  my arms on the table, my butt bones on the hard wood chair, my feet in socks on the floor, some pain in my upper back between my shoulder blades.

Three things I can hear:  my fingers typing on this too sensitive Mac keyboard, my tinnitus buzz, the distant hiway.

Two things I can smell:  well, this was a challenge to begin with because of the allergy medication so I stuck my nose into my little dog's fur (mmm poodle smell), then stuck my nose outside into the rain...mmm, rain.  Of course, rain makes me a little nostalgic.

One thing I can taste:  Peet's "Ethiopia Hambela Farm Organic" coffee (yes, I'm a member of the coffee-of-the-month club) with oatmilk and honey. 

OK.  It's so much easier to watch movies outside the house by myself because I've always done that.  But to watch on the small screen a movie that he, once upon a time, might have loved, just feels too sad.  I did watch Mank, finally, but had to break it into pieces separated by time.  I hated watching it small screen.  I hope it reruns big screen in theatres.

No, I don't want to buy a bigger screen.  I want to

GO BACK TO THE MOVIES!

Nevertheless, I shall attempt watching all the other Oscar nominees on my own.

Or not.